Lost in the Reflection

i am grammatically challenged.

Just Things January 8, 2012

Filed under: NOTE TO SELF — lostinthereflection @ 6:56 PM
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This ONE has been in my head and I haaaaad to get it out before I imploded.

This holiday got me thinking… a few years back, my sister discovered a cassette tape from Christmas 1979.  She was 10 years old, I was 19 months old (do the math.  Nine years apart).  That Christmas o’79, my sister received a cassette recorder & microphone.  She proceeded to interview my mom and dad and that was the cassette tape she discovered.  She played mom & I that tape.  I was 28 years old & that was the FIRST time I heard my father’s voice.  Dad was 6’2″, slender and handsome.  I always assumed his voice was a deep one; something that matched his towering stature.  I was so wrong.  The voice that emitted from those speakers, was this soft, gentle voice.  Dad passed away 4 1/2 months after Christmas 1979.  It was 10 days before my second birthday.  

He passed away one month after this photo. P.s. That's baby me 1year, 11months.

Here’s where I’m going with this:  My daughter was born just a matter of weeks before my birthday.  Seeing her grow & develop, creates an image of ME when I was that age.  How Christmas for her this year differed from last year.  She was a little more involved and easily WOWED.  Last year?  Not so much of anything but an 8month old blimp in a Bumbo seat.  It makes me think about how I was at this age (19months/20 months).  It was the last Christmas with my dad, and him with me.  Thinking of this makes me cherish EVERY FREAKING MOMENT.  Makes me wonder if dad KNEW this was possibly his last Christmas.  He had the cancer.  Dad was 34 when he died.  This May, I turn 34.  

I CAN’T IMAGINE CHECKING OUT NOW.

My daughter @ 16months, along with myself & husband.

 

An entry I wrote in November January 8, 2012

Filed under: Uncategorized — lostinthereflection @ 6:28 PM
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after all these years January 8, 2012

Filed under: Uncategorized — lostinthereflection @ 6:22 PM

VH1 just aired a Kurt Cobain program.  Sorry, but Nirvana never gets old… to me at least.  Perhaps it’s because it takes me back to high school— some people may not want to go back to those cruel years, but as weird as I was in school, I’m okay with it.  I like who I am/who I was.  

 

So Kurt Cobain’s program… it never occurred what was the content of his suicide note.  Holy crap you gotta read it.  Roll your eyes if you wish, but I got a bit upset.

 

THE NOTE.

 

 
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